The Nuance of “I Know But…” and Nabi (15 August 21)

There’s a nuance to the Korean name of Nevertheless, which I think the translation fails to capture. In Korean it’s 일고잇지만, translating directly to “I know.. but,” and it’s not a mistranslation by any means, but it is most definitely lost in translation. But why does this even matter? It matters because we mainly see the show from Nabi’s POV, as she is our protagonist. 

The show spends a lot of time exploring the growth of the people around NB, navigating the growing pains of their relationship with others. But we see everything through NB’s eyes. She’s our heroine and we get to see the messy, confused inner workings of her brain. If I recall correctly (and I could totally be wrong), Nabi is the only person who says “I know…but”. And it is one of the biggest reasons why she struggles so much in expressing herself through her art and her words, and coming to terms with her true feelings. 

NB can’t move forward because she presumes to know too much. She presumes to know the truth about JE when I don’t think JE knows what his heart wanted prior to a couple of eps. Ago. 

JE is not someone who is easy to read, and his inability to let himself be vulnerable and feel the emotions that one might expect him to express. He draws the line whenever someone gets close enough to sense his vulnerability, shutting down in his own way.

This in and of itself is no foundation for a relationship to grow on, but it’s complicated further by all that NB THINKS she knows about JE. We know as viewers that a lot of what she believes is far from the truth. She presumes to know because she’s conditioned herself. Much of her character motivations are ones of self preservation. 

NB watched as love broke down the walls of those in her life, seeing them showing the most vulnerable parts to their partners, only for them to hurt in the end. NB refuses to let herself fall down the same path as her mother, believing in love to the extent that you are willing to give every part of yourself to them until you’re a shell of yourself. She can only see the two extremes: one that gives every piece of them away even when there’s nothing left to give (her mom), and one that takes and takes until there’s nothing left to take (her ex), and while it’s understandable that she wants to protect her heart, she’s just slapping a bandaid over a bullet hole. It does nothing but momentarily deceive your eyes. 

I don’t even think that NB lacks the self-awareness to see this, it’s that she won’t allow herself to. It’s moments in which she’s overwhelmed by her feelings that cause her forcefields to malfunction ever so slightly, i.e when DH confesses his feelings to her. She presumes to know the feelings and intentions of JE because it’s a calculated risk. It hurts, yes, but it’s much less painful to brace yourself for a fall than to free-fall through the air, uncertain of what you’ll encounter and where you’ll land. 

We see where this dogged determination and so-called blissful ignorance lands NB though, and her inability to open herself up to uncertainty is detrimental to her in many ways. Her art suffers when she’s unable to express herself (hence her comment about wanting to do digital art). Until she begins to open up, these things will haunt her. 

As we’ve established, the show is above all, NB’s story, and each episode title is named for her feelings, what she presumes to know. But each episode, we see these beliefs challenged and disproven. NB faces the very real consequences of her actions time and time again. 

Again and again, we see how NB is burned by what she believes to be true, and she will keep getting burned until she accepts that the walls she put up to protect herself have now trapped her in.

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